The steady rhythm of rain hit against the windows of the estate, seeming to echo through the silence of Rin’s room as she lay curled up in the bed. It had been a week since her fight with the Qunari Arishok. One week since she had nearly died, one week since she had spoken to Fenris.
She sighed quietly, curling up as her slender fingers twisted in the loose bandages that were tied around her torso. Her flesh wounds had healed for the most part, as Anders stopped by each evening to check up on her, healing anything that needed it, but she was ‘encouraged’ to continue wearing them over the scarring just in case. She grumbled quietly and after a moment pushed herself up, grunting with the effort.
The rogue swung her legs over the side of the bed, pulling herself up and grabbing her clothing that was neatly folded on the edge of her bed. She pulled on the shirt and slid the skirt up her legs, finally turning for the door and limping towards it. A hiss came from her lips as she put too much pressure on her still shattered leg.
The door slammed back into the wall and she winced at the sound, not meaning to slam it so hard. She turned, gaze settling on the stairs and she stumbled over, determined to go down, she needed to get out for a while. She grabbed the old staff that her sister had left years ago before going to the Circle, the one that had been their fathers. The golden staff was sturdy enough for her to bear her weight on it as she walked, and it helped her descend from the stairs.
“Serah Hawke.” her head whipped around to her name, blinking her amber eyes at the dwarf that sat by her desk with his son. He held a stack of papers, sorting through them so they wouldn’t fall from the surface. “You’ve gotten more letters. Do you want me to put them with the rest? It seems most the people in the city need the Champion to help them.” he commented.
“Bodahn, just leave them on the desk. I’ll sort through it all myself when I get home.” he nodded at her response but she spoke again before he could turn to go back to work. “Though, I do have a question. Has anyone stopped by while I’ve been asleep? At any time this week, actually. Orana’s been quiet about it lately.”
“Well, earlier your other dwarven friend. And yesterday the guards woman was by to see how you fairing.” he paused for a moment. “The young elven girl with the old ships’ captain as well, they stopped by two days ago together.” she shifted forward on her toes, hoping the next would be word of Fenris. “Besides that, no one else comes to mind..” she suddenly seemed to deflate, pouting to herself. Right, no Fenris. No Fenris. Not in a week. She hadn’t seen him for an entire week, and it was driving her insane.
“I see, alright.” She sighed and turned, gazing to the door, almost as if she were willing it to slam open and reveal the elf. His perfectly tanned skin and snow white hair, forest green eyes and brooding nature. Those soft, warm lips turned in the faintest frown, but her eyes could never leave his. They’d be locked together and he stalk over to her, grabbing her by her unbroken wrist and turning her so she was held close against his chest. He’d keep her close, his face held close to hers and he’s whisper words to her in the language from Tevinter he knew so well before crashing their lips together, kissing her with such passion for so long her lungs screamed for air. But she’d stay there, returning it, pressing herself close to him, just loving the touch, the closeness. Just loving him, the kiss, the moment.
She sighed, leaning on the staff with more of her weight as she gave into the fantasies. Oh how she wanted him to come back, to be with her. She wanted to brush her fingers over his cheek and trace the markings lightly, softly kissing his skin but being careful not to hurt him in any way. She wanted him to return and share drinks with her as she taught him more of how to read, then have him hold her before bed so she could sleep close to him, against him. She just wanted to be with him. She just wanted him.
“Hawke?” she was jerked from her thoughts as the door slammed open. She looked up with a small hum from her lips, blinking her eyes wide. There stood Anders, though soaked from the rain, he was starring at her. “Oh, you’re up on your feet? I just came by to check on you...” he sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. She sighed. She did not need to deal with him right now, not yet at least.
“Huh? Well, I’m better today.” she smiled at him, and he seemed to believe it, smiling back. “A lot better in fact. I was thinking of going out for a bit. I just really need fresh air, you know? And some light. The window just isn’t cutting it.” she tried to laugh softly as he walked over to her, offering out a hand. Unable to deny it, she took it and he helped her balance.
“I could help you if you like. And look at your wounds before hand. If you want, I mean.” she glanced up to him and shrugged, trying to look indifferent.
“Sure, I don’t mind. Um, but then I’d have to go back upstairs, wouldn’t I? I mean, the library could work too, couldn’t it?” she suggested. He gave a small nod and looked over, pulling her lightly over to the library. He helped her walk over and once passed the door he shut it, turning to her. The rogue was already propping the staff up against the wall and reaching for the hem of her shirt. No matter how much she did this, or how many times she told herself he was just her healer, it wasn’t any less odd for her.
She tossed the shirt aside and began picking at the bandaging, looking at him as he pulled out a few poultices and potions from his belt, setting them on a bench just in case. He reached over and slowly undid the clean bandages, unwinding them from her stomach and chest, revealing her pale flesh beneath, only scared by a few light cuts and the large gash from where she was impaled against the pillar.
His cold fingers ran against the scar, checking it over as his eyes glanced from her down to the wound. He leaned away, wrapping the bandage up in almost a wad and setting it beside the potions.
“You shouldn’t need to wear that anymore, everything’s healed perfectly.” he commented, humming softly to himself. “Looks good, Ri- Hawke. You’ll just have to let your wrist and leg finish healing, and I’ll leave the potions and splints here for you. If you need anything else though, have Orana come get me. I’ll come as fast as I can.” he gave her another smile as she tugged her shirt back on. She nodded and returned a small smile, leaning up to press her lips to his cheek as thanks. That almost seemed normal. A friendly way of gratitude, right?
“Noted, Anders, and thanks for all the help with it. Probably wouldn’t have healed as well as it did, nor would I be standing here is it weren’t for you.” she reached and grabbed the staff, heaving open the door. “Bodahn, have Orana put the potions and such in my room while I’m away, as well as a few books from my personal shelf. I’ll be gone until this evening, so have what you all like for a meal later.” she paused for a moment. “Anders, mind helping me to the Hanger Man? I could sure use a drink.”
Without waiting for an answer from Bodahn, she allowed Anders to careful take her injured hand in his and lead her to the door, and into the rain that was pelting the Kirkwall streets.
The door opened easily, though almost knocking the pair back with the boisterous laughter accompanied by deafening music and horrible singing. Rin couldn’t help but grin under her soaking wet hair that covered her face. She pushed it from her face to look around, glancing to Anders before pulling him along with her to Varric’s room. She could already hear the voices of some of her friends, she could tell them anywhere.
She pushed her way through various patrons, calling out greetings to a few ones she knew well. She kept her pace quick and let Anders help lead her up the stairs, though she put most her weight on the staff.
After a moment she stopped at the door, having yet to be noticed. The table was lacking only four seats, and she knew one always empty from Sebastian, the other had been her sister’s in all the years before the Circle claimed her. Varric sat at the head of the table, with Merrill and Isabela on each of his sides. Aveline was sitting next to Merrill and Fenris next to Isabela, leaving room for Rin next to Fenris and Anders next to Aveline. The seating arrangement had been Rin’s idea in the first place, having each sit next to someone there could bear not to stab or set on fire. At least, for the most part.
The duelist assassin had planned to take a seat before anyone would notice, but Isabela was already on her feet and bounding over, a grin on her lips and her eyes sparkling with a near drunken glee.
“Hawke! It’s about time you got back on your feet and came to visit us! Especially on the weekly game night!” she pulled the other rogue away from Anders and into a hug, almost causing her to drop the staff from her hands.
“Okay, okay Isa, get off me though. I still heart like hell....” she sighed as the pirate let go and planted a soft kiss against her lips, taking her hand and dragging her over to the table to sit. She placed her down besides Fenris, and Rin couldn’t help to blush as all eyes seemed to drift to her. She was use to looks, but usually it was when some one was talking, and not when Isabela tried to kiss her.
“If that’s over with,” Aveline finally spoke, leaning forward on the table. “It’s good to see you up and about Hawke, I’m glad to see you’re feeling better. It’s been odd without you.” Merrill gave a nod of agreement before smiling happily to her.
“I agree, but you’re all better now, right? Things could go back to how they use to be. But better! You’re champion now! Champion of Kirkwall!” she giggled, kicking her feet lightly below the table. “Do you think they’ll give you a statue? Or maybe a party with a lot of cake? Can we go?” Rin laughed quietly, smiling as the young Dalish elf continued babbling softly.
“I’m more surprised you don’t have anything to say to anyone, Hawke. Or anyone else to you. It’s been a week and you’ve not spoken a word or heard one. Must be more than a little boring.” Varric cut in, tilting his mug of ale before taking a drink of the contents. Rin shrugged as she reached for one of the extra mugs.
“It’s only been a week, and I see so many of you regularly. I’m not surprised really. And I don’t have much to say since I’ve been asleep. Unless you want to hear what runs around in my messed up head when I sleep.” she joked and took a sip. She was honestly hoping no one would tell her they wished to know, since most of her dreams had recently been nightmares about her family or even her friends, or her fantasies of what she wanted out of the future with Fenris. The latter she needn’t tell anyone, since even she knew it was never going to happen.
“If it’s anything from you, maybe it’s better we not know.” Varric gave her a sly grin with a wink, as if already knowing. “We’ll just have to use the future time to make up for all of the missed time. I assume you’ll be taking more time off due to your fractured bones, however?”
“Ah yes, those..” Rin sighed, giving a hopeful glance to Anders. “Well, with any chance, they won’t keep me out of it for too long. You know me, always wanting to get back to the fighting. Killing dragons, the undead and the countless slavers and thugs. Have to keep this city a safe place after all.” she tried to shoot them all a smile as her fingers tapped against the side of the mug, but at that it went silent.
After a moment, Fenris pushed himself up from the table, his gaze kept down to his own half finished drink. He kept his hands flat on the table, mumbling quietly that he needed some air before leaning up and turning to leave. Each person watched him, though Merrill with curiosity and Anders with disdain. Rin hummed softly as she watched him exit and descend from the stairs, sighing.
“What pissed in his wine?” Isabela snorted, leaning back in her seat. “All drinking and silence lately. And then that? He can’t just up and leave, we haven’t even finished the game.”
“It is getting late,” Aveline spoke simply, giving a shrug. “I’m not surprised. And it’s been a while since we’ve all been in the room. I can’t say I’d blame anyone for leaving, I should probably get going myself.”
“I say good riddance,” Anders hissed under his breath. “We don’t need somebody like him here anyway, such an attitude.” Rin sighed at the words and sank lower in her seat, almost pouting like a child.
“Blondie, come on, you know how she feels about him...” Varric sighed, Merrill giving a firm nod of agreement. He turned to Rin and leaned forward. “Which is why you should go after him. You know Hawke, he did drink a lot. He might not be safe to go wandering off alone. And with that old master of his still on the loose...and this weather...” at that the woman perked up and pushed herself up, downing her drink in hopes it may dull the pain.
“You’re right.” she nodded, giving a small smile and reaching into the hidden pocket of her skirt. She pulled out a few sovereigns and laid them on the table. “And in return for all the good words earlier, have a few drinks on me.” she gave them all a nod before she turned, grabbed the staff and headed out, limping down the stairs.
“I don’t see what she sees in him!” Anders growled, laying his head on the table and shutting his eyes tightly. “She could do so much better than him! He’s not worth the time.”
“Just like the stories, true love knows no bounds.” Merrill chirped, splaying her fingers out against the table. “She just loves him, and even if he denies it, he loves her. I think it’s cute~!”
“See, Daisy has it right.” Varric smiled again as he reached for the money Rin had left. “And it’s just how she is. She set her mind on him and she won’t change it easily. But both are just as stubborn. That’s why we have a pool going on which caves first.” Aveline sighed and rolled her eyes, finding this the time to get to her feet and turn to leave without another word. Isabela however, gave a nod in agreement as she hummed and glanced to the money as well.
“But even knowing that, you’re not giving up on her, are you?” she smirked. “How cute this is, you’re simply a third wheel in this case. But not the good kind. Now, if it were like when her cousin and I met with Zev and Leli, then it’d be more fun for you. And possibly for myself as well. Just think about it!”
“I’d...I’d rather not. I’d rather not see you with the other two and her cousin either.” he grumbled. “Too late for that, I see. But I should be going...need to get this image out of my head now..” he heaved himself up and got to his feet, not even waiting for a reply as he left as well.
“So...with all of them gone, what shall we do now?” Merrill asked as she blinked, looking at the dwarf and pirate remaining. Varric gave them each a grin before holding up the money.
“Hawke did give us this for another round or two. And after that, let’s find out the details of the happenings, shall we?”
The elf turned his head to look over his shoulder, his eyes narrowed against the rain soaking through his clothing and plastering his snowy hair against his face. He watched the rogue limp up to him, her wet finery hanging against her frame, showing each movement perfectly, sticking to her curves. Her boots clattered against the stone beneath them, along with the tapping of the staff that helped her walk. She brushed the brunette tresses away from her eyes and stopped when she neared him, glancing up to him.
“R-” he stopped himself, taking a deep breath. “Hawke, what is it?” he immediately looked away from her, his fingers curled against his palms as he tried to keep his breathing even. He hadn’t been this close to her for a week, and he didn’t want to be. He didn’t want her to remember when she woke up and he was there, he didn’t even want to remember. He had over stepped his bounds and there was no going back.
“I-I wanted to make sure everything was alright, I haven’t seen you very much any more.” she explained simply, her breathing coming in soft pants. Had she run to keep up? Even on her broken leg? “You left with out saying a word to me, and I though maybe it was my comment-”
“It was.” he cut her off. At this point, there was no more pushing her away, not tonight. He never wanted to again, but he always found an excuse to. “You need to take your time healing, don’t push yourself so much. Rin, you need to be careful and not let your wounds get worse.” he was quiet after he spoke, averting his gaze of hers. He slowly reached out a hand, not caring anymore. He had to, he wanted to. He needed to do this.
“Fenris I...” she trailed off as he grabbed her hand, pulling her over to him. He held her against the cold, wet metal of his chest plate, finally looking to her as he did. She opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. The metal of his gauntlet was freezing against her flesh, almost as if it were ice burning through it. She enjoyed it though, it meant this was happening. It meant she was close to him.
“Rin...please?” he murmured, his lips brushing against hers. She shuddered, her eyes fluttering as she formed a reply. It was happening. Everything seemed to slow down, but her heart pounded against her rib cage, like a butterfly trapped in the confines of a cage, wings beating the restraints in order to get out. She could only force herself to nod as her slid his other hand up to tangle in her soaking her, resting against her scalp as he pulled her close, softly kissing her. She leaned up on one foot, making it easier as she lightly returned the kiss.
A moment passed and he leaned away, giving her a sweet smile as he let her go. She made herself smile back, almost drowsy with such a feeling. It had happened. The closeness, the kiss, the moment she had wanted, had waited for. He was so close to her, she could even hear his heart beat when she rest her head against his chest. Finally she hit a wall, everything seeming to catch up with her.
“Fenris...I’m sleepy...can we go home? I want...you to prove you can read...read to me let me cuddle you and Ivadia till I fall asleep.” She felt her head go slack as he held her close against him, before everything seemed to fade into darkness and the last words she heard were spoken quietly, in that voice she loved so much, and the last thing she saw was that sweet smile he almost never gave her.
“Of course, Rin.”